I recently moved back to my hometown after eight years away. As such, I am having to reacquaint myself with old friends and make new ones. The friends I had in college were no strangers to innuendo and/or double entendre, and we were all quite good at coming up with off-color and (sometimes) slightly inappropriate remarks. From the short giggle at things that are otherwise innocuous to "That's what she said" and the all time favorite, "Your mom." "Your mom" is a standard retort to almost any insult that comes my way, and is infinitely versatile. For example:
Insulter: Gah, dude, your face is scary.
Insultee: Your mom's face is scary.
It's an air-tight response, really. And it all but dominates my conversations with peers.
With people I don't know too well, I'm never quite sure how to bust out the "Your mom" phrase. Will they take offense? Will they even get it? Will they think I have a immature sense of humor? I mean, I do, but I don't want them to think that's all I think is funny.
So, I'm open to suggestions. Tell me how I can win friends and influence people, just like Larry King. Only without being creepy and old. Or maybe just without being creepy.
2 comments:
The key to Larry King's success, in my humble opinion: the malformed shoulders and old-timey microphone. Letterman has the same kind of microphone. Coincidence? I think not.
Then again, Letterman doesn't have the shoulders. But he DOES have a gap in his teeth. So maybe you need the microphone and some sort of prominent physical defect.
By the way.. your mom has a prominent physical defect.
I find this blog very amusing because I have always found the "your mom" phrase funny in every instance I have heard it used. Since I almost got slapped by a fellow waitress at "the crack house" for saying it to her (her mother was dead) I have not used this phrase in awhile. Please, for my sake, keep on using it!
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